Well, I have been TRYING to eat gluten-free since July. My daughter had a positive result from Enterolab and she and I both had positive dietary responses. Another daughter got on the bandwagon after seeing our success and she is doing great (eliminating casein too) Now, my son (who lives on his own) is trying this as his fiance is positive he has this as well ---I do too! Now, for hubby......

Here is my problem: we are now empty nesters (at least during college months) and he likes pizza, pasta, chinese food, ice cream cones, etc. He wants to support me, BUT he likes to try new places like a restaurant called "noodles"...does that even sound like a place a gluten-free person should enter????? It's hard walking into Panera, Einstein, etc. I know I am preaching to the choir here. You all know the story. How can I get him and my other extended family to see that this is real for me and not just another trendy fad thing I am doing for a short while before I slip up again?

I have been glutened a few times and he is amazed at the speed at which this affects me. I can tell with 20 -30 min if I have ingested something wrong. You can too, right? My extended family thinks I'm crazy (mine and in-laws) and anything in moderation is fine and so "having a little" is ok. Like my very well intentioned sister who dumped all the spaghetti sauce onto the wheat pasta before "we" got our chance to put a little on our rice pasta..... See what I mean? So what do you do?

My husband is a great guy, but I just don't think he really gets it. Anyone else in this situation? I'll look for your advice.
Thanks~

It's frustrating!!!!

There is another thread going on right now about this too!!!!

As for resturants.....call ahead and see if they can accomodate you...maybe you and your hubby could compramise!!! NOTE: As far as I know panera has a gluten-free menu!!!!! Look online! Noodles and Co has one too! And many of these places are aware of CC....just be proactive and call ahead!

Good Luck!

Sigh....I feel your pain. It's the same with my in-laws. (Luckily, my mom and brother understand and are supportive. In fact, my mom read some of my books and is now trying a gluten-free diet, as she has several health issues which suggest that she also has a gluten intolerance.) I ended up having a loud confrontation with my in-laws. It's not the way I would have chosen to handle things, but they kept arguing with me, questioning whether my kids and I really needed to be gluten-free. I told them that it was immaterial what they thought, as my dh and myself make the decisions for our kids, and that they needed to respect and defer to our those decisions. It was very unpleasant for a while....but my m-i-l seems to be coming around now. She actually asked me the other day about foods that might be "safe" to serve if she had us over for dinner. I think that's progress. My decision about how to handle this with extended family members has been to assert, in a matter-of-fact way, what our dietary needs are, and if I'm not 100% sure that I'm being understood, I just bring my own gluten-free food to avoid problems. I think I've stepped on toes a few times, but oh well....it's better than my kids or me getting sick! Also, I've been very verbal about celiac disease, gluten intolerance, the gluten-free diet....I'm assuming that if I keep talking about it, I'll eventually raise their awareness.

As for my dh....he mostly supports the fact that the kids and I need to eat this way, but he's not 100% behind it. He keeps asking me if "a little" would really be that much of a problem, but then refuses to read the literature I provide to answer that question. He also has no idea how to implement the diet - I came home the other day, mid-afternoon, and the kids hadn't had lunch yet, because dh "didn't know what they could eat." Luckily, the kids do know what they can eat, for the most part, and so they snacked and didn't "starve." I've pointed out to dh numerous times that everything in the kitchen, save for his English muffins and beer, is gluten-free. (And his English muffins are kept in a bread box - the kids and I call it "the gluten box.") He has also been frustrated that I'm so hesitant to eat out since we went gluten-free. I'm trying to get the "lay of the land", concerning local restaurants, but it's slow going. We had one disastrous experience in a local place and it scared me. We've only been doing this diet for about 3 months....so I'm hoping that I'll get more relaxed as we go.

Sorry....not much advice....just wanted you to know that others are going through the same thing!

Rho

I just want to add Panara Bread has a gluten free menu or they will bring the ingredience list to you to look over. Gluten free does not mean that you will be house bound for meals. Although, there is a risk at eating out, it has it's benefits too.

oops...Jess covered this.

Thanks ladies. I know my family means well and I didn't want to gripe, but I guess I needed to vent. Thanks so much for all your advice.

What I've found is that the need to eat gluten free is not a reality for a lot of family members. It's not something they can SEE. I finally realized I was expecting too much of them and their understanding....ultimately, it was all up to ME to establish the eating rules for myself rather than expect everyone else to be continually solicitous of my situation. So now if he suggests eating somewhere that I know has nothing for me that is gluten free, I'll just say "Nope, I don't want to eat there." I'll suggest somewhere else, and he's always agreeable.

I also think I was subconsciously expecting him (and others) to more or less eat gluten free as well. But now I realize I shouldn't ask that, so when they eat gluten things I have just learned to ignore it and eat my own things. I don't make it a big deal in my mind or feel bad about it.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that the adjustment had to come from me. Once I was firm about things (as opposed to being wishy-washy for a long while), that cleared the air and things actually became quite easy. I'll admit part of the ability to do this only came after I myself had accepted my own need to be resolutely gluten free no matter who I was with. No exceptions.

I can't identify with the spouse issue, as my husband is a million times more supportive than I ever guessed he would be (and I thought he would be perfect). He eats gluten-free at home, except for sandwich bread, which he makes on dedicated counter space. He is incredibly careful and does most of the cooking for the two of us - a definite plus! I really can't say more great things about my husband and his supportiveness - and I'm so sorry to hear that yours isn't "with the picture."

However, my parents are another story. They actually cut me off of their insurance policy (claimed it was an "accident" because they forgot to send in college admission statements to prove to the insurance company that I was still in school and therefore qualified to be covered). To this day, my Dad still doesn't understand what it is I can't eat (he's offered me bread so many times I can't count). They're more supportive now that it's been 1-1/2 yrs but they still don't "understand".

My FIL asked my husband the other day when we were making plans to have lunch with them while on vacation if I wasn't "over that already".

["Over that already" - That sounds like my mother who thinks my 13 year old daughter with Celiac and 17 year old son with Ulcerative Colitis will "grow out of it". Sigh!!!


We just found out for my daughter so I'm not sure how supportive everyone will be yet. It can be frustrating when others don't get it.

Virgie


quote name='emcmaster' date='Sep 2 2007, 08:28 PM' post='340660']
I can't identify with the spouse issue, as my husband is a million times more supportive than I ever guessed he would be (and I thought he would be perfect). He eats gluten-free at home, except for sandwich bread, which he makes on dedicated counter space. He is incredibly careful and does most of the cooking for the two of us - a definite plus! I really can't say more great things about my husband and his supportiveness - and I'm so sorry to hear that yours isn't "with the picture."

However, my parents are another story. They actually cut me off of their insurance policy (claimed it was an "accident" because they forgot to send in college admission statements to prove to the insurance company that I was still in school and therefore qualified to be covered). To this day, my Dad still doesn't understand what it is I can't eat (he's offered me bread so many times I can't count). They're more supportive now that it's been 1-1/2 yrs but they still don't "understand".

My FIL asked my husband the other day when we were making plans to have lunch with them while on vacation if I wasn't "over that already".
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